Love the single life but find that you’re ready for a relationship? Re-entering the dating scene can be scary but oh-so exciting! With a little advice and some concrete tips, you’ll zap the fear and approach dating with all the confidence you need.
From tips that have come down to us from previous generations of wise women, to tips on how to text your date, here are 10 of the best dating tips for single women. Read them all, then choose a few for your own personal dating strategy that’s sure to get things rolling in the best of ways.
#1. Playing Games Will Get You More Games, But No Closer to Mr. Right
Sure, by exercising your manipulative female powers you can snag a few guys who fall for that sort of thing. But tricks and clever games will only get you temporary relief from your dating dry spell.
If that’s all you want- to have some short-lived fun – then by all means load up your plate with dance floor tactics aimed at hooking a guy for a night…but don’t expect anything more from games than just more games!
#2. If You Act Like a Diva, You’ll Get Treated Like a Diva, Which is Not Always What You Think
Sure, being high maintenance on a date might make you feel special – expecting to be taken to the most expensive restaurant in town, making him wait, being rude, or otherwise acting like a Diva is fun for a night.
But after that, most guys aren’t so sure they’re getting the better side of the bargain when it comes to dating a Diva. Unless you’re Beyonce or a high-powered CEO, chances are you’re just a regular ol’ girl once you strip away the Diva exterior…so what’s in it for him?
And why not let that real girl shine through? Even real-life Diva-level women don’t necessarily act like Divas …we’re pretty sure Bey is as charming as pie on a date.
That brings us to the next tip:
#3. Be Yourself and Have Fun- Who Else Can You Be?
If you’re used to guessing what a man wants, and trying to be that woman in hopes of making the date go well, then you’re approaching the dating thing all wrong.
Of course we understand that when a guy is drop-dead handsome as heck and you get lost staring into his eyes or imagining his arms around you, it’s hard to keep your cool and be yourself. Transfixed by the attractive energy that exudes from your dream date, you might not be able to resist the urge to simply say what you think he wants to hear.
Just don’t compromise yourself too much!
#4. Be Relaxed, But Treat Every Date as a Special Event
Nobody ever said that “being real” meant slobbing out and acting like a date was no big deal. Date are special- the thought of meeting a great guy, having a great time together: what could be more exciting, after all?
Don’t try and be nonchalant about your date by acting like it’s no big deal you’re with him. Make the event special and show that you care. Wear something that makes you feel special, whether it’s your favorite pair of jeans or a ruffly pink dress- we all have our own special style.
#5. Once and For All, Get This Straight: It’s OK to Make the First Move
There are advice books that tell women to let the guy make the first move, no matter what. It’s something to do with letting them think they have the power in the relationship.
But what happens when you see that guy across the room at a party, and he’s just standing there? How can you possibly let that one go? You simply have to make the first move or you’ll hate yourself for missing a great opportunity to follow up on a strong attraction you’re feeling.
Guess what? There are ways to make the first move without seeming like you’re doing a thing. The “first move” doesn’t have to be a bold walk to his face with a declaration: “Let’s Dance”.
The “first move” can go like this, leaving the guy’s “power” intact: casually walk over and give him a nice big smile with some really good quality eye contact.
Get that move down pat and see what happens next. If he likes what he saw and yes, that’s what it comes down to sometimes, then he’ll come over and make a move, the “first” move!
#6. Don’t Feel Confident? Find a Way to Get That Way
If you put yourself out there as insecure dating material, who knows what terrible types you’re going to attract. There are actually men who prey on that sort of woman, and you don’t want to date them so…work on being more confident.
Don’t like the way you look in a tight dress? Find something else to wear, or start working out. Don’t like your body in anything you wear? Then it’s time to start seriously thinking about body image and fitness. If you’re insecure about your body because it’s out of shape, then I’m going to be a little harsh here: get in shape!
If you don’t like your body, don’t expect to get very far in the dating world. Sure, guys will like a woman’s body no matter what, but if you don’t have the self-esteem to lend to a relationship, that won’t get you very far.
If you’re shy about speaking to men, then let your body do the talking- do you like to dance? Play sports? There are plenty of ways to meet men which involve doing things rather than just talking at a party.
#7. Don’t Load Him Up With Details About Your Life
Seriously, he just met you, don’t overload him with information. This is not the same as saying “don’t talk about yourself, just listen to him talk”. We’re not suggesting you simply act as a sounding board while he does all the talking.
It’s just that the details of your life are really not that interesting to many people, especially those that don’t know you. Save that level of information for when you’re in a serious relationship. For a date, keep it light and fun.
Besides, a little mystery is very provoking and actually makes dating fun.
#8. Be Nice. That Doesn’t Necessarily Mean Be Sweet- Just Play Fair
What we mean here is to be kind to your date. Don’t order the $50 entree when he’s ordering the $20 plate. Don’t put your nose in the air when he picks you up in an unimpressive car, or if he takes public transportation.
If he brings you a gift, be appreciative. Do something nice for him in return: cook him dinner, whatever you can offer. Show excitement when he arrives to pick you up- don’t ever try to downplay your feelings when they’re sincerely positive towards your date. Looking “cool” when you feel excited deep down is playing a game, and games get you nowhere fast.
Just be fair, be nice, and show appreciation for his efforts so they don’t go unnoticed. Someday you’ll realize it’s not every day you have someone trying to please you and do nice things for you!
#9. Lay off the Idea That You Have to Be in Constant Contact
Ok, you’ve met a great guy, had a date, and now what? You can’t wait to see him again, you hope he’s not dating someone else, and you’re simply dying to know what he’s doing!
Texting, calling, and emailing this guy constantly is a bad idea. Please give him some space before you smother him with communications. This is not to say you shouldn’t contact him at all. One text is enough. If he doesn’t answer, then it’s his loss and you should move on.
Besides, if you give him his space, you’ll know it’s genuine when he contacts you.
#10. Playing Hard to Get Means You’ll Have a Hard Time Getting a Date!
This really falls in the “game playing” category, but it’s such a common mistake that we thought it best to feature this dating tip on its own.
In contrast to the girls who try too hard to stay in digital contact after the date, there are girls who won’t answer their phone, a text or email from a guy they just dated.
Unless you had a terrible time and never want to see the guy again, this is not the way to go (even then you should have the courtesy to tell a guy you’re not dating him}.
Playing hard to get will just confuse and frustrate a guy, and what’s the point of this strategy anyway? Are you hoping that when you finally do answer your texts or your phone, he’ll be so grateful that you’ll have him wrapped around your little finger for the rest of your life?
Not going to happen! He’ll simply be annoyed and may even ask you why it took so long for you to get back to him. It’s a dead-end dating strategy.
Speaking of ends, that completes our 10 Dating Tips for Single Women. Hope this helps, and good luck out there!